Make Me An Offer - Please!

Wow, even the leafy enclave of Rosedale has their share of fixer-uppers.

This beauty must cause the wringing of many manicured hands in this neighbourhood.

Gee, maybe I could afford to live there. I bet this could be had for less than $2,000,000. What a steal.....

Who?

How quickly they forget.

Man, calling Wayne Gretzky simply a "Hall of Fame Forward" is like calling Mother Theresa a pretty good nun.

And this from one of Canada's major sports networks. I could understand if this was in the People's Republic Toronto Star or the stuffy Globe & Mail. But Sportsnet?

Even Wikipedia pays him more props:

"Upon his retirement, he held forty regular-season records, fifteen playoff records, and six All-Star records. He is the only NHL player to total over 200 points in one season – a feat he accomplished four times.

In addition, he tallied over 100 points in 16 professional seasons, 14 of them consecutive. Gretzky's jersey number, 99, has been retired by all teams in the National Hockey League.

Nicknamed "The Great One", he is generally regarded as the best player in the history of the National Hockey League, and has been called "the greatest hockey player ever" by many sportswriters, players, and the NHL itself".

Personally, I think Doug Gilmour should hold that title, for his glorious years with the Leafs alone.

Bring back Dougie!!

But Gretzky would be a close second.

Don'tcha Just Just Hate It When.....

....your flashlight is dead and you go to put in new batteries - and they're dead, too!!

Those battery makers have a real scam going!

Ohhh....."Best Before Jan 97".

Hmmmm......never mind.

I guess those last batteries lasted pretty good......

Can you say Pack Rat?

Well I Agree With The Bull Part

Just Like My Office...

...if you add up the size of all the offices I've ever had.

At the Doors Open Toronto tour of the TD Centre, this is a shot of the Chairman's office.

Or part of it.

Larger than most homes, it is 2,000 square feet.

And with views like this, he must have more will power than me (among many, many other traits) as I would get nothing done all day, looking out the window, down at the streets ("Hey, I know that guy").

Of course, the view might only be one of the reasons I would get nothing done all day.

But who's counting.....

Doors Open, But Windows Closed

And that's a good thing.

Because as I found out at the recent Doors Open Toronto, the TD Centre, [here a shot of Scotia Plaza as seen from the 54^th floor of the TD Centre]
to maintain the original integrity and feel of the building, uses only single pane glass!

So don't want to be leaning too hard on it to get that one really great shot.

At least that is what the tour guide "script" instructed us to tell visitors.

I was volunteering at DOTO as a tour guide one day and elevator operator the next.

From the bottom looks pretty ordinary.

But when this building was constructed in 1967, it was the tallest building in Canada and put TO on the map as the financial centre of Canada.

Command Central!

Minus the Commander.

Elevator takes 27 seconds to cover 54 floors. Second fastest elevator in Canada.

Fastest one was the one next to me, damn.

Ha ha, elevator operator joke [visitors ate it up! Strangely enough, though, after ad libbing several more clever factoids, many people commented that the ride felt a lot longer than 27 seconds. Huh?]

But nope - CN Tower elevator is the fastest. No joke.

"He missed the tag!".

Could (almost) see into Skydome to watch the Jays play (white open dome beyond CN Tower).

And also got an up close and personal view of the refurbishment of Bank of Montreal's First Canadian Place.

FCP is not maintaining the original architectural features of their building as the little tiles (lower half) keep falling off.

So they have to replace every last frickin' one. Floor by floor.

Ouch! Can you say "increased banking charges?"

Holy Crapamolie!

That's a lot of samolies!

28 big clams for a condo?

Now my place is worth less than half of this, so I'll just have to get used to making due without the screening room, servant's quarters and the extra eight bedrooms.

And this is the behemoth I've been watching go up over the last year. [See "I Don't Believe It" and "Good, Only 40 More To Go" for a refresher]

Except now I can see it looming over mia casa.

Literally. From my balcony!

And, once it is at its full 55 stories (it's at ~35 right now), it will cut off what little afternoon sun I have.

I've hated this one for awhile - but now I really do.

Really, 'cause It Used To Be A Piece Of Crap

No Respect. I Don't Get No Respect

What are you talking about UC?

A picture looking down some dingy alley?

Zoom in, eh?

Oh....

Canada's Boxing Hall of Fame Museum.....

Wow, and I thought being shunted to the Outdoor Life Network was bad enough. Boxing ain't what it used to be.

MMA rules, huh?

Don't Go There......

This is the eerie sight that greeted us on the drive out to the Kananaskis Mountains a few weeks ago.

And this, just before the anticipated Judgement Day. The Rapture....

Dark and foreboding....

I Warned You...
You could almost feel the spirits floating above these ancient native lands here.

Turn Around Now!
We were travelling through the Stoney Nakoda Nation's lands on the trip south.

No, No No...
Gulp.....

Never Mind....Gee, what a difference a day makes.

Those Stoney Nakoda aren't so bad afterall.

Just As The Elders Had Planned

In fact, the Stoney Nakoda Nation are down right sociable!

As their hotel and casino resort can attest as it greets you warmly as you enter their land.

And if I'm not mistaken...that is the traditional Stoney Nakoda headdress that the...uhhh...elder is wearing.

Very nice.

Kinda Cool

Very effective signage.

And speaking of getting higher, very apt name for the church, too.

Although the name is really missing one letter.

Otherwise, most of my friends would be members there.

Poor Michael Rabin

You Know It's True

Oh, keep your panties on (as my Grandmother used to say) it's only a joke. Sort of....

This is from the hoarding around, what else, a new condo going up near by.

I'm not really sure to whom this ad is directed.

What He's Likely ThinkingI added "Grrrr" because that what women are really thinking.

Or maybe, "Ahooga, baby!" Like the sound of a sub surfacing.

Or maybe not.

Maybe I need to get out more....

Closer To The Truth

More Truth - Year Two

Ain't No Tree Huggers Out West

As seen in the Kananaskis Mountains gift shop.

Oh my....

Oh oh!

Only in Canada, eh?

Tomorrow's the Rapture. He won't be saving these guys.....

Cowboy Afraid In The Jungle?

Nah, just getting up close and personal with one of my new buddies that I met on vacation.

Is He Getting A Little Too Close?Nah, just chillin' with my bro.....

Okay, Close Enough!Ha ha, good fun. These are, of course, staged photos, for your enjoyment.

No Urban Cowboy would actually cower from some little bird like this.

Here, he's trying to charm one of the local ladies (the object of his affection just hidden by the shrubbery on the lower right).

Until I came along.

"You Again!""Hey! I'm working here...."

So we kind of agreed to stay out of each other's hair after that.

But these little fellas have pretty big cajones.

One guy told me that after their first boozy night here, his buddies were rapping on his balcony window about 1am.

Then at ten to seven the next morning, more rapping. He told them to get lost, but the rapping continued. He finally slid open the door, and there stood my buddy, in full feathers.

I guess the person the previous week used to feed him. So now he was looking at the new guy, as if to say "Do you know what time it is? Let's get with the eats!"

So sometimes size really doesn't matter. It's all in the attitude.

Cowboy In The Mountains

Made it to the mountains of Kananaskis last week. And did some rock climbing.

Although it took a while to get there, the beautiful views at the top made the climb worth it.

Hey? Where did this picture come from?

That's....obviously a phony.

Well, later on we did a real hike along Lower Kananaskis Lake.

Really.

We even had a guide pointing out various....stuff.

Judging her audience's Outdoor Q, she kept it to; "That's a lake."

But we all made it back safely.

In time for more PowerPoint presentations and chocolate doughnuts!

Jimmy Buffett (I Hope) Would Be Proud

Turquoise blue ocean reflected in porthole window of beach bar.

Ahhh.....

My only result of an arty shot of the week.

But not my only attempt....


Usually when the cameras come out, so do the bar tenders.

I had to politely explain to Nicholas that I was going for an art shot.

He graciously said, "Okay, okay....."

However, this time I got me in it.

Is it a good sign if all the bartenders way at you?

Either they are very friendly, or I have a problem.

What a friendly people they are, these Mexicans.

Okay, I attempted a few more.

If I was ambitious, I could have played with Photoshop. But I am not.

I call this "Sun Setting Into Mango Margarita".

[Note to self: Alberto knows how to make very good mango margaritas.]

This was one of the local Mayan dancer/warriors who entertained at sunset.

Okay, it was Eddie, (another) one of the bartenders pouring drinks at sunset.

But, regardless, a nice way to end any day.........