Thursday 20 November 2014

Exsqueeze Me?


I had to read this article three times.

Some group had a fundraiser in support of the endangered Black Rhino in Africa.

A silent auction, one guy bid $350,000 on the first prize.  And he won.

The first prize; you get to kill a Black Rhino!

What?

Now the controversy is not that the guy gets to go over and shoot a Black Rhino.  It's the US government is not sure if they will let him bring it back here to mount on his wall.

Which he should be able to do, to show his support of the Black Rhino!  Well, not this one, but certainly all the other ones.



And in the same paper - or a day later - not to rub it in, but.......

I appreciate the asterisk.

Monday 10 November 2014

Only In Ontario......


.....this type of sign would not be allowed.

Too many politically correct mambiers would be outraged at this "racist" name.

Down in Florida, not so much.

"Hell, I don't know what half this crazy ass shit you people eat is.  But I'll sell it to you. Cheap."

And because you can't get much more than Dorito's and Kraft Dinner in some of the supermarkets here, I do shop at a few local stores.

For the faint of heart, this Latina store has a little more palatable name.

And they are very helpful.  I told one guy I was looking for a spicy Thai pepper sauce (that I couldn't find in the local Pic'n'Save) so he took me to the Thai section, but no luck.  Finally after about ten minutes of searching he found it, in the Chinese section.



He said, "This is Chinese, not Thai."

I said, "Hell. Chinese, Thai, all this crazy ass Asian stuff looks the same to me."

Okay, I didn't say that, but I knew he thought that's what I was thinking.



Last week I found a can of JalapeƱo Peppers.  $1.25, I'll give it a go.

At the cashier I say, "I've never tried these before.",  obviously assuming that because she's Latin, she has tried everything in the store.

I said "Not sure how to cook them.  May not like them."

She just stared at me and said, "If you don't like 'em.....don't buy any more."

I said, "Uhhh....that's good advice."

Then she said, "If you like 'em....buy some more."

 I said, "That's also good adv....."

"Now get the Hell outta here."

Okay, she didn't say that.  But I knew that's what she was thinking.

You don't get much small talk for $1.25.


P.S. When I got home I opened the can.  It was full of JalapeƱos!

The most I've ever bought before is 1. I don't know how many you can eat in a sitting, but it will be a while before I buy more, even if I do like them.

I am getting caught up on my reading, though.  [Ed. note: Great....toilet humour.]



Friday 7 November 2014

Now We're Talking!

Booze not mentioned anywhere!

Or fires!

Still good!

This will be my new party place.

Thursday 6 November 2014

Oh.....And Enjoy!

Holy crap!


 
Actually, I stopped reading, and walking, after the first one.
 
Although I must admit, #2 probably does make sense.

"That's the third time them damn drunks done burnt down the dock!  Guessin' we gonna need us a coupla rules...."



Tuesday 4 November 2014

I Think I'll Take A Pass On This Place


Unless you're talking about the restaurant "Pass/Fail" rating system.

In which case, I think I'll take a fail on this place.

And that....bug....is under the glass on the restaurant display wall.  He's not just flying by and took a rest.

Although he has good taste in the potato omelette.

Actually, if this is indicative of the rest of the place, he may have good taste in the potato omelette.

Crunch crunch...



Monday 3 November 2014

Update To Yesterday's Post


Here is this year's Swamp Buggy Queen going for a mud bath. 

Yesterday's pic was last year's queen.  Because this year's race hadn't ain't been run yet yesterday.

See what I'm saying.

Sunday 2 November 2014

Hell Yeah!

Got me stuck in the middle of yer annual Swamp Buggy Parade yesterday.



Some big ol' boys gonna be running in the swamp on Sunday.

In th' mud.


Swamp buggy racing originated in this southern Florida country back in 1940 and 9.

I don't know where swamp buggies originated.

Or why.


But the buggies have come a long way since then.  With V8 engines and turning torque you wouldn't believe.



Because the dad gummed things kept getting stuck in the gol durned mud!

 
And, as usual, the Shriners got involved.

Here they are running around in their Yabba Yabba Do buggies, a la Fred Flintstone.

And, also as usual, the lucky Swamp Buggy Queen gets to go for a mud bath with the race winner.

Or is it the lucky race winner gets to take the Queen for a mud bath?  I can never figure that out.

Regardless, you won't see this in downtown Toronto.

Let's see, Board of Health would be involved, Transportation Safety would raise multiple concerns, women's groups would be outraged and those Yabba Dabba Do buggies would not be allowed anywhere near the street.  Oh, and I suspect there would also be a few liquor violations....

But ya gotta love the southern USA!