Friday, 30 July 2010

Very Sneaky, Mr. Blueberry

If you look closely, but not too closely or you'll go blind because of my piece of crap camera/phone thingy, you'll see these blueberries say "Product of Canada".

But if you look even closer, you'll see that Naturipe Farms is actually in Naples, Florida.

What, who?

Is there some sneaky labeling rule that if you do a tiny something - like put them in the plastic box - they are now considered a product of Canada?

Okay, Google, Google, Google.......

Guess so. Because according to the Canadian Federation of Agriculture, "The food can be grown elsewhere, but if 50.1 per cent of its cost is Canadian then it becomes a Product of Canada."

They say this is misleading. And I believe them.

But even so, how can 50.1% of the cost be for putting them blueberries in a little box. Unless maybe they have Celine Dion putting the dang things in one by one.

Ouff, my head hurts.

Maybe I'll stick to ranting about tearing down heritage buildings. Then I have no trouble calling it "Destroyed in Canada".

Tuesday, 27 July 2010

A Three Hour Tour.....

After such a lovely day biking and docking - see previous post - how 'bout a little boat tour?

....after dinner....

Beautiful. Load up the self-hydraters and the crew and let's go. No sun tan lotion required.

This was the second attempt to tackle the lake. Yesterday the battery was dead. God's telling us something.

Went and got the spare battery. Also dead. Theme emerging.

Went to neighbors and got spare battery from his boat. Any guesses? Dade. All dade. Dade, dade, dade.

Did that stop us? No, no no. Charge em all up and the first non-dade one wins.

Soooo....nothing finer than out in the boat with an undead battery, in the dark with just a hint of gale brewing.

My memory was drawn back to last year when we attempted a similar excursion.

[See "Omen?" for a refresher.]

This episode was running in an endless loop through my loopy brain.

Looks like one other member of the crew has the same memory.

What was that noise?

Was that thunder? One crew member really likes thunder.

The voice of reason came over to make her feelings known.

What was that over there?

Is that Davey Jones locker rising from the deep?

Another visit from the only sane crew member.

Well just a few more spots to check out.

Okay, no harm done. Home - all safely accounted for.

Monday, 26 July 2010

Summertime.....And The Biking Is Easy.....

Was up in lovely North Bay for part of last week. [Notice reference is to week, not weekend. Ha ha, they're all the same now!]

In addition to taking necessary hydration and splashing off their dock on Trout Lake (sun glinting off windscreen of boat below - more on boat later), what manly adventure would be complete without a little bike tour of the waterfront?

And what manly adventure doesn't start off without a visit to the local bike store? [See Mike & Tod's Harebrained Adventure for reminder.]

And just so everyone can relax, we followed all the rules for this bike trip; one beer every 5k.

We went over 250 kilometres! Burp. Okay, 16 km's.

Here, one sad bike boy in need of a 5k beer.

Whew....disaster averted.

Too bad we couldn't stick around for the boat show.

Or the eardrum bursting show, as some of these cigarette boats are known. You hear them ages before you can see them.

This little baby needs four, 250 horsepower Merc motors to get it going.

Ha ha, only four? And a cutesy little truck to pull it.

Another sad biker boy (okay, the same one) waiting patiently (okay, not patiently) for another 5k beer.

Take the dang picture, nobody reads this crap anyway.

[Ed note: author too busy taking what was likely lifesaving hydration to take post-beer picture.]

As is the tradition with manly adventures, only the finest establishments are patronized.

Here, permanent residents of the "Cecil" look to have their own fire escape. Quick and....well, quick, anyway.

So a great tour. With lots of cash pumped into the local patio economy. But only in 5k increments.

Monday, 19 July 2010


A while back I posted a note about how some punks stabbed a guy to death 31 times and they got two years probation. [See "Canadian Justice" for a refresher.]

Guess I wasn't the only one that thought this was a lighter-than-usual slap on the wrist from our tough Canadian judicial system.

Because one of the murderers was just shot to death, point blank, not far from where they killed the other guy.

And I can hear the parents now; "Oh, he was a good boy. Always helping people."

Now, I'm not a big gang banger supporter, but sometimes, just sometimes.......

Saturday, 17 July 2010

Wine Store?

Nope.... neat little Italian restaurant.

Unfortunately, not in my neighbourhood......

The wine all loooked so inviting, too. But I kept banging my fingers on the damn glass case. Cheecky owner.....

So What Are You Saying.....?

...what's going on inside?

And what does "Fully" mean? Totally? Completely? Absolutely?!

Betcha there are no glass windows here!

Guess my neighbourhood is not so bad after all....

Monday, 12 July 2010

Most In Need Of A New Marketing Manager

And from the looks here, not a lot of folks gobbling up them old clams.

Although if this was on the Gulf Coast, it might be very effective.

"When were these clams caught?"

"A long time ago."

"So they're not fresh?"

"No, not fresh at all!"


Sunday, 11 July 2010

I Don't Know What This Is, But I Like Saying It body butter....

Hi, I'd like to buy some mini body butter, buddy.

Could It Be A Chain?

Not the venerable old Wheatsheaf at Bathurst and King in Toronto! A sister ale house in New York?

Nope - just a plaque hanging in my buddy's house.

And here is a very interesting mural on the side of an old warehouse in the same Seaport area from an earlier post.

Hard to tell which are real features and which are simply painted.

Okay, maybe not for everyone, but I had to walk right up to it to see that the upper gabled windows on the left were in fact flush with the wall. As the shadows were drawn perfectly for that time of day.

[Brooklyn Bridge on the right. The one in the middle of the building is painted. I didn't have to walk up for that one.]

Also went to a Civil War museum. Where two of the bravest, yet virtually unknown, soldiers are honoured; General Daniels and the even lesser known, General Arnotti.

If anyone does not believe in reincarnation....think again......

Desperado's.....Born 200 Years Too Late
We would have been there if we could!

In the meantime, we'll have to make due with $4 beers.

Thursday, 8 July 2010

Only In The Big Apple

Nobody tells them where to park!

Spent the first jubiladed weekend visiting New York.

If this had been Canada, not only would no one being parking in a construction zone, if anyone had tried, a stranger would have helpfully pointed out, "Excuse me, friend, you obviously didn't see the sign."

Canadians would quickly become an endangered species in New York.

And spent one of the days driving/slaloming/attacking the streets with a native New Yorker. What was that movie; Eyes Wide Open.

Yup, that was me. You could add "knuckles fully white" and "pants fully loaded".

Also did the obligatory Yankees game.

With the obligatory Jays-stinking-the-game-out part as well (11 Yankee runs in one inning).

To add to the fun, it was 98oF. In the shade!

Unfortunately, we weren't in the shade.

So my new best friend quickly became the powerful and all knowing "Vendor".

I was mesmorized by his repeated mantra; "Bea hea! Cold bea hea!"

"Please Vendor, hear my plea!"

[Seemed a lot funnier when you are delirious with heat stroke and over refreshed on $11 beas.]

And keeping with the beer theme (and why not?) you know you are in a Hispanic section of New York when the Cerveza ads are all in Spanish.

Except, of course, for the word Cerveza.....

I know one word in Spanish, and they didn't use it.

Now That's More Like It!


32 ounces of amber nectar for $4.

And when you are in the nice bars (like Jeremy's Ale House) you know you're getting the good stuff.

But if you're not, who cares....

What do they mean "anymore?"

So lots of cool air conditioning enjoyed by all.

And yes, you are correct. This could also be called a bra-itorium as well.

Over all the walls and hanging from the ceiling were bras. Lots of them.

However, from the looks of them, they were about the same quality as the beer.

But if you spend $4 enough times, who cares!

Also did a boat tour of the New York Harbour.

Lots of good history, blah, blah, blah.

Now, where is that all knowing "Vendor" when you need him?

Thursday, 1 July 2010

Not Mine!

Another huge honking condo going up in my neighbourhood.

Is there no end? Or upper limit?

The two words that floor me (no pun intended, okay maybe a little) are the sixty and the five.

Holy smacker doodle!

With apologies to you know who, 'scuse me while I kiss the sky!

Sure, it is at the corner of Yonge & Bloor, so prime territory.

And sure, it prevents suburban sprawl.

And sure, it won't block my sun, 'cause I don't get no stinkin' sun, facing north.

And they only tore down some ratty, old $10 Jeans stores to do it.

So....I guess I'm okay with this one.....


Ergo Must Be One, Big Boy