Coolness Attracts Cash

Of course, wherever there is an abundance of cool funky stuff, cash will be sure to follow.

This was just one of many monster boats in the harbour. This one even has a freakin' condo built out the top. Maybe not. But it is still huge.

This vessel is from the Isle of Man. One of the Channel Island tax havens in the UK. Guess that's the only way you can afford one of these babies.

And I guess they also try and fit in wherever they go. "Yeah yeah, put up a Canadian flag up there. Not too big."

Beep Veep!

The Vancouver harbour has these neat (how would I describe Vancouver without the word neat?) little shuttles that take you all over.

Scientists say that the Aquabus, like the bumblebee and flying, should not be able to float - but it does. Unless there is any wind at all, or a passenger leans to look out the window.

View looking up at the captain. Who seemed to be a fifteen year old kid who read a book the entire trip and steered with his knee.

And no safety issues here. Where are the life jackets?

According to Captain Ahab, who looked at me like I was some sissified Eastern boy, you don't need 'em.

I decided not to give him my opinion of his steering technique. Although he did start steering with his foot not long after this (honestly). Not the change I was necessarily shooting for.

Match Made In Heaven

What kind of Arnotti guy wouldn't like some arknotty toys?

More from funky Vancouver........

Technically, They Are Correct

They did say "ocean view". And there it is.

I would have been equally okay with "roof view", as the roof cut my window in half.

And I really couldn't have criticized them if they had said "piece of crap view". All are equally applicable.

Went to the beautiful city of Vancouver on business and stayed at the funky Granville Island Hotel. Pretty neat little place.

The hotel anchors the "island" which was a former industrial site for Vancouver. And everything seems to be original materials (lots of corrugated iron for all the buildings).

I understand they can't change very much, since I think the whole area is covered with asbestos and lead, and if they renovated anything, they have to tear apart and remediate the entire island. So it just goes merrily along.

And, once I found out the roof was the roof of the in-house brewery, and this little hotel was a brew pub, that made everything seem a little nicer.

Who Knew

That the ocean had employees and that this is where they all park.

Now You See It.......

....and now you don't.
Pretty cool little floating village right on the harbour front. As the tide comes and and out the houses go up and down.

I guess you never know what the view out your front window will be. And since these are right on the boardwalk, you never who will be looking in, either. Better be careful what you're scratching.

I think the lady in white is hoping to catch a peek. In about three hours.


These are really neat little floaters as well. Roof top gardens and you can have your kayak in the water right outside your front, uhhh....or back, door.

Only on the left coast, in la la land, eh?

Oh Yeah?

Not according to me and a thousand bums in downtown Calgary.

This experiment went well until I tried to get the cart back in the store. Then the wheels locked up. So I just slowly backed away and left.

I'm sure people thought, that guy tried to steal a shopping cart, that bum tried to steal a shopping cart.

I almost had to say, "No no, I may look like a bum and I play one on TV, but I wasn't stealing it. Uhhhh....I was.....uhhhhh.....just testing...uhhhh...the.... aw, forget it."

"Any spare change?"

[Idea courtesy of Ontario gentlemen farmer Mike. Who's no bum, either.]

Mmmm....Ginger Beef

Delicious, huh?

You bet. Until you check out the fine print on the back.

Luckily you can't read this. Because if you did, you'd see this little box of death has 80 grams of fat. 80! Including 16 saturated and another 16 trans. That's enough to stop a horse's heart.

I was waiting for a prescription to be filled so I had time to check out the prepared foods section of the grocery store.

When I told the pharmacist what I saw, she said, "Do not buy anything over there. Ever." And I believe her.

Oh yeah, and a 100% of your daily recommended max amount of sodium. At least you can check that off your to do list after dinner.

Good Try Lads

Went to the, as it turns out, final Calgary Roughneck's playoff game of the season. They lost so they are out, but they put up a brave fight. And lots and lots of action.

And boy, do people ever get dressed up for the games.

Not that it matters much, but which one of these tubs of fun costs $5.00 and which costs $5.50? If you guess wrong, your heart will be missing out on lots of extra trans fat.

As my mother says, never eat anything bigger than your head. But in this case, I'll make an exception......

Tragedy

One of our city's most vulnerable citizen's has lost his buggy in the river. At least he made it half way across before he had to abandon it.

Well, back to Safeway.

That's Better

Ahhh....I get it, a patio.

That only took them about a month and a half to fix that ball busting hazard.

I wonder how many twigs & berries were sacrificed in the meantime?

Pretty Pricey

200 grand for some mushrooms?!

Those better be the good ones that my friends in North Bay go on and on about.

From The Ocean To The Mountains

So from being down at the beach one week to up in the mountains the next. Too bad it was for work.


But with this scenery, not too shabby a week.

What Was That Address Again?

I wonder how many customers got lost before they had to put this big boy up?

No More Jamaica

Boy, middle of May and we get hit with a blast of winter. On the plus side, though, the traffic report was hilarious.

Toto, we ain't in Jamaica any more.

Still More Jamaica

We did an excursion to Dunn's River Falls one day. The idea is you walk up the slippery falls, about a hour exercise. The rocks are slick with moss and the water is ice cold.

Because of my gimpy knee, I obviously begged off (and took photos).

But I guess I'm more sissified than I thought, because there were guys carrying tiny babies, groups of families and this old lady, who needed a &@$%!#% cane to get around. After seeing this, I just shook my head at myself.

In my defense, the others in our group that did go, all complained about the bruises they got.

And who says Canadians are silly? Here is the standard shot of a bear dressed up like a Mountie in the Calgary airport.

Are we predicatable or what?

El Uso?

Who translated this? Me?

"El uso de loungos not permitto."

Now That's More Like It!

In case of emergency - run like hell.

Even though this was taken in Jamaica, where things are - to put it generously, laid back - they have the right idea when it comes to emergencies. At least compared to Calgary.

Just got back from a week in Bob Marely's country. And even though he's been gone for over 20 yeears, ganja still rules!

Now He's Gone Too Far

I love Jimmy Buffett dearly, but come on, an "Air Margaritaville" bar in the Montego Bay airport?

They already have about five or six "Margaritaville" bars all over the island. How much money does he need?

But it is a pretty neat bar. A cool oasis, far from the bedlam of ganja sellers and pocket pickers.

And there's no escaping them. I tried to pass by one outstretched hand and he admonished me, "Show some respect, mahn, some respect".

So I went over and shook his hand and he immediately had me in a death grip. "Dey call me Da Fixer. What you need, mahn?"

So I guess it isn't that bad a place. Especially after a gruelling week of swim-up pool barring....ahhhhhhh.

In fact, more airports should have these tings, mahn.

And all this, in the place where they tried to shoot Jimmy out of the sky.

The words along the arch are a line from Jimmy's song Jamaica Mistaka . Where they ask him to come back to Jamaica if they promise not to shoot him out of the sky.

More Jamaica

When they say mini-bar, they mean it.

Red Stripe in the fridge, of course, but also rum, vodka, gin and brandy. Refilled daily. How's a guy supposed to leave the room and get to the swim up?

If you know the name of your mini-bar guy, you got a problem. Mahn.

And there are lots of places to buy trinkets. No problem, mahn. I'm surprized there weren't more T-shirts printed with this expression.

Lots of Jimmy Buffett themed stores as well. I seem to remember yelling at this guy last summer.

And they grow 'em big down here. A moth in the lobby. Actually a behemoth moth in the lobby.
Zoom in, eh?

And of course, what vacation would be complete without a Rastafarian steel band playing outside your window. All week long. If I hear Buffalo Soldier one...more...time......

Luckily, they usually got tired about six or seven and went home.

And we picked the absolute perfect time to get away (see next post). It snowed and was below freezing every single day we were gone. We got updates throughout the week as different groups arrived.

Usually the crummy weather follows me on vacation, but not this time, baby.

And did I mention they had a Jerk Hut on the beach? [Yeah, yeah, did you work there, Urban?] The best jerk chicken you will ever find. Although we had fancy restaurants available, we ate jerk chicken (with the hottest jerk sauce you will ever find) every day on the beach. On plastic plates on our knees.

And one of our party should really be nominated for a Nobel Prize. Did you know if you turn a Frisbee over, it will hold seven beer? Seven, I tell you! It even floats in the freakin' ocean!