Nighttime Neighbours

Vut eez dis spooky place? Maybe it is Count Floyd's veddy scary castle.

Actually, it's the Masonic Temple, just across the street from my place.

Hey, keep it down.

New Neighborhood

Downtown Calgary this ain't. Very fashionable new location I'm in.

I must still be sporting garb with a western flair, though, as from their looks, people are thinking "Hey cowboy, where's your horse?" or "Did you get those boots from a real cowboy?". Ah, good fun.

Amazingly, some even called me by name. Or close, anyway. They got it wrong and called me Bob. Oh, and pronounced it with two O's. But very friendly people just the same.

Of course, I'd never be able to afford to go in one of these shops. Or be allowed in, apparantly.

I actually started to feel like the guys I try and avoid in downtown Calgary.

Hmmm....maybe I do need to spruce up the old wardrobe.

Nah......if my duds were fine for Calgary, and for Toronto for 16 years before that, and Sarnia for eight before that, they they'll be just fine for here.....

But With The Good.....

But I guess the dark side of being able to live in this area, is that you must be old. And they're not too subtle about it either.

"Oh hi, Ted. I'm...uhhh...just going in to get some books, for my mother. What's that? Yes, she did, a few years ago. But, uhhh, I gotta go."

The Last Of The Yorkville Hippies

Hang in there, guys.

One of the few that have stayed true to their early Yorkville hippy roots.

I mentioned to one of my friends that I was now, amazingly enough, living in Yorkville. His (older) brother called out, Hey man, that's where all the hippies live.

I said, thanks man, sounds like you're still living in the 60's.

All the hippies are long gone.

Knee To Know Basis

For anyone interested in my ongoing knee saga (....maybe my mother is reading this....) here I is getting ready for arthroscopic surgery, scheduled for the next morning.

Above; a very manly, hairy knee.

Below: a newly scrubeenied chihuahua, knee. Ready to go under the axe. Poor little fella.

Icky Picture Warning

Okay, so that wasn't so bad. Okay, it was.

Actually did it without a general anesthetic, just a local. So got to watch the whole thing on TV. Not sure if that was a good idea. Kinda cool, but kind of creepy.

Got to watch him cut open three little holes in my knee, slip in the spinning knives and then watch him go after the torn meniscus (there ya are, ya little bastard. Come mere, come mere, wheeeeeee (like sound of dentist drill), oops......now I gotcha, wheeeeeee.

Over in about 45 minutes.

Actually, the local is the way to go. Usually I don't want a local anesthetic, I want one of the fancy foreign ones. But this way, no one hour wait to come out of the fog, no feeling nauseous, no chance of dying.

And the only evidence of the attack is hidden under just one bandage, three little incisions.

No pain at all. Sweet.

Plus, a week off work! Sweeter.

Reward?

....but only one, the doctor says. Sigh....

Okay, but it'll be a big one.

A good test of the surgery; can you walk to the bar? Yes? You're good to go!

Ahhhh......

.....that's better. Beer, and lots of it, at a sports bar. One I hadn't been to for several years. [Uhhh...someone put that coffee on the table by mistake.]

Great bar, great location, next to the Air Canada Centre. And on the way over I saw huge lines of girls waiting outside the ACC. For a concert I guess.

I asked our little waitress who was playing at ACC. She said, the New Kids On The Block. I said, oh, aren't you going? Her eyes widened and she looked at me as if I'd asked her, are you near death?

I guess the girls in line were really women and those women were really my age. And I, apparently, am near death.

{Ed note: I guess I need to work on the shutter settings of my fancy new phone/camera thingy.]

And yes, that is a shot of the Jays losing. So all is well with the world again. Now I just have to wait for the Leafs to start losing. Won't be long.

Pay no attention to the follically challenged forehead at the bottom. Couldn't be a friend of mine.

How come he isn't at the New Kids concert?

I See........

Okay, so I checked out the options on my new phone/camera. Fairly sophisticated new phone I have here.

Whereas my old Motorola...piece of crap...had zoom and indoor/outdoor adjustments, etc., here are the specs of the new, much more expensive, baby:

Zoom: None
Timer: None
Brightness Options: None
White Balance: None
Quality: None
Color Tones: None
Shutter Sound: None
Fun Frames: None
Messaging Add Ins: None

I queried their website "How do I change the camera resolution on my Instinct?

Answer: There are no configurable options available to change the camera resolution on the Instinct handset. Pound salt, you loser. [One of those statements I added.]

Obviously the Marketing Department didn't write the FAQ section.


That reminds me of a Calvin and Hobbes cartoon when they are doing a safety check before tobogganing down "Deadman's Peak";

Seat belts? None
Steering? None
Brakes? None.

Great, let's go!

They're Supposed To Be Your Friends

So how come they're jacking up the price on ya? See, it's not just us big, bad Western oil boilers.

What's that? Who do they buy their gas from? Uhhh....never mind. I don't know. Delete, delete.

Bungee Cowboy

No sooner do I move to Toronto than I head back to Alberta. This time to gorgeous Kananaskis, west of Calgary and south of Banff.

We had rain the day before, so here the clouds are lingering low over the mountains, reluctant to leave this beautiful country.

Good Advice

This isn't something you like to see while wandering in the Kananaskis countryside. Bear in area? But now several other questions quickly come to mind.

Which area? The area behind me? A big bear? A hungry bear? A big, hungry bear?

But if you look closely, they provide some very good advice - do not give the bear flowers! Who knew. That's okay, I've always believed in the old adage that candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker.

Shhhhhhhh....

Sights during the rain we had, mentioned in the earlier post. The low clouds blanketing and muffling all sounds (even the sounds of that damn bear eating people).

As I stood watching for several minutes, the clouds rolled down the hills, like a huge, slow motion wave.

Almost spooky, but tranquil at the same time.

Maybe this new phone-camera-thingy is not so bad.

I'm Back, Baby!

But my new neighbourhood looks no better than the last.

This is the greeting outside my building. They might as well have posted a sign saying "Get Lost".

So my building has no visitor parking and obviously not much parking near by. So if you are coming for a visit - take the train......

{Ed. Note: photo taken with new camera phone thingy. Can you spot the difference? I better be able to for what I paid for this new piece of crap.]

Time To Go

And not a minute too soon.

The blogger formerly known as Urban Cowboy will soon be only Urban, as I am moving back to Toronto.

Now I know Toronto is not perfect, but I can't believe we are getting guys popped in broad daylight outside a Timmy's (just in behind the red arrow, as shot from my balcony) - and across the street from my own grocery store, for crying out loud!

Which is what happened at noon earlier this week.

Luckily, it is just druggies offing other druggies. But what I'm worried about is, if they are all hepped up on their Mary-gee-wanna, their aim might not be so good.

Just kidding about the Mary-gee part. It's crystal meth and crack that are king in Cowtown. And those are the guys that are freaky. The easy money in this city attracts a seamy underbelly of guys who've never had this much money in their lives. Or this much drugs.

So good time to be heading out. I'll miss a lot about the city, but not everything. But soon it will be time to start bellyaching about Toronto, that piece of crap communist city masquerading as cosmopolitan. Gimme a break.

But until then, I'm going on hiatus. Yehaa, y'all. UC, soon to be U.

I Bet The Clock Is Ticking......

...til the wrecker ball gets this cool little place just off the Red Mile, in Calgary [see next post for more on the Red Mile].

Now these are the type of druggies Calgary needs more of. These guys have probably never shot or stabbed anybody.

But, like all neat architecture in this city, it will likely be gentrified before too long.

Luckily, I'll be gone first.

El Paso, Texas?

Nope.....

San Pedro de Marquis, Dominican Republic? Nope.....

The Red Mile, Calgary? Yup.

Who'd a thunk it? Cool little church right off the Red Mile [1]. I was half expecting Clint Eastwood to saunter out, glare and start firing.

[Ed. Note 1: The Red Mile is the mile or so of bars leading from the Calgary Saddledome, where the Flames play hockey, to even more bars.

Since all good Flames fans wear red jerseys during games, this mile long stretch became a sea of red after every playoff game. And then a sea of pee and then a sea of hurl. Subsequently, this year it was a sea of blue, as the cops shut down all fun.

Actually, the Flames essentially did this themselves, by losing in the first round.]

You Had Me At Detox Body

.....with an Ionic Footbath? Where have you been, Pham Spa?

I suspect there'd only be about half of me left after removing all toxins, but if that what it takes.....

Now that I think of it, there are several of my friends (and you know who you are, HA boys) who would also have less junk in their truck after a Pham Spa session.

We should add a session to next year's closing ceremonies.

Fish & Relatives....

...as the joke goes, both start to smell after three days.

I think this "visitor" is well beyond that threshhold.

50-50.....

...are the chances of this little guy lasting til the winter.

"Big boys to the left."


"Big boys to the right."

"Tear down, re-build,
Fight, fight, fight".

I guess I shouldn't be so high and mighty, anti-growth, as I live in one of those big behemoths in behind there.

Yeah, it's so easy to criticize others.

Maybe that's what I'll do today......