Tempest In A....Beer Bottle?

The Government Of Ontario has just introduced "Buck-A-Beer".  Brewers can now sell beer for $1.

Okay.....

But if you listen to the pundits in downtown Toronto, you would think the world has stopped spinning on its axis and we will all be flung into oblivion!

It has been called "reckless", "dangerous", ill-advised" among many, many other adjectives.  This will increase drunken driving accidents.  Students and the poor will be adversely affected. What about the children?

Brewers call it foolhardy and a "race the to the bottom".

So what did Doug Ford do?

Did he slash the minimum amount for which a beer can be sold from $5 to $1?

Or from $3 to $1.

Or maybe cut cut the damn price in half!!

He cut it from $1.25 to $1,00.

A quarter.

Okay, everybody can go back to sleep.

And I might just head to the beer store.....

The More Things Change....

....the really faster they change.

I remember my Frosh Week.

Sort of.

Back in the day, this would have been more like the the headline.

Yeah, baby!

That's Using The Old Noodle

When you've really got to "gator done" - as thery say in Florida - why not use all the help you can get.

This gator was seen crossing a canal in Key Largo.  Likely something tasty was waiting on the other side.

Actually he doesn't look a lot different from many of the blue haired ladies floating in our community pool.

Except probably a lot quieter.

From The "Why Didn't I Think Of That" File

So I guess the latest silly social media trend is now the "Tip The Bill" Challenge.

And this should be confused with other social media trends like the "Tide Pod Challenge", when kids (it usually seems to be kids) eat a Tide Pod (luckily I don't know what a Tide Pod is) or the "Hot Water Challenge", where kids pour boiling water over (usually) other kids and the latest, the "Fire Challenge".  Where - you guessed it - kids set themselves on fire.

But enough of that. Back to the "Tip The Bill" Challenge.

This is where you....tip the amount of the bill.  So if your bill is $50, you leave a $50 tip.

My friend Maya, who wrote this article, "wholeheartedly recommends" participating in this and that it is "really thoughtful".

I wonder what Maya's day job is - a server?

I'd like to propose another challenge.  And one that I wholeheartedly recommend and also feel is really thoughtful.

And it is the "#GiveJim$100" Challenge.

Anybody who sees me gives me $100.

So come on, be one of the cool kids!  I'm heading downtown right now.  Hope you see me soon!

"That'll Do, Tractor"

Old Bess, as seen at my buddy's Pig Roast & Beer Bust in south-eastern Ontario this weekend.

I'm guessing Old Bess doesn't owe my buddy anything by now.....

Dang!

Just screwed up my favourite pair of sunglasses.

Dropped them and both lenses popped out.

Glued them back in, but got the left on the right and right on the left. So the lenses dig into your cheeks.

And glue all over the lenses.

There goes $4.

How To Avert Another Crisis

A new report gives recommendations on how the province can prevent an impending mental health crisis.

The top two recommendations;
1) higher pay for psychiatrists
2) more psychiatrists

Who produced this report?

Oh.  The Coalition of Ontario Psychiatrists

And, according to the report, the province must act on this immediately!  I'm sure there's a pot shot or two in there at Doug Ford, but I didn't read the whole report.

But I am thinking of preparing my own report, by the Coalition of Old Retired Guys;

Top recommendations (although there would be many);

1) cheaper beer (hey, Dougie already did that!)

2) more hot babes that like old retired guys (okay, he's no miracle worker)

You scoff.  But my recommendations are no more self serving the psychiatrists ones.

And the province also better act on mine quickly.  Because let's face it, nobody wants an old retired guy crisis, where they all walk about telling the same old stories over and over.

What?  It's too late?

Funny.  That reminds of the time.......

Considering Who They Are Sponsored By, Better Than No Breathe

Wah! I Want That To Be Me!

Hey, We've All Got 'Em.....

The Jig's Up

Gangbangers all over Toronto are doing palm plants on their foreheads.

"Crap!  They're banning guns.  I guess we are going to have to turn ours in, boys. The City of Toronto has outfoxed this time!"

And then they laughed and laughed......



Post Script - two days later.

Rex Murphy, the excellent columnist for the National Post, also commented on the handgun ban requested by the City of Toronto.  [Double click to better read.]

My only question is; does Rex read my blog...?


Here is a link to the full article.  Tough Questions Need Answering

Don't Even Think About It

"You will lose every time."

You've Come A Long Way, Baby!

Took the ferry yesterday over to the Toronto Islands.

Had forgotten what an amazing view this gives you of the skyline of the fourth largest city in North America.

The Skydome on the left with the iconic CN Tower beside it.

And a forest of skyscrapers everywhere else.

But it wasn't that long ago that the TD Centre was the tallest building in Toronto.  And in the British Commonwealth.

The what? 

The TD Centre.

Huh?  Doesn't look like much.

Here, I'll zoom in.

Where?

There!

But you're right, doesn't look like much - now.

But in 1967.....

So 50 years later, we have forgotten the profound impact it had on the city of  Toronto.  Transforming it from sleepy little colonial outpost to worldwide banking power.


Many people hated it then.

Most people can't even find it now.

At least without a little red magic marker highlighter.

So little Toronto has certainly come a long way.....

And man and his dog.

And his dock.

And his drink.

Life is good today.


I just noticed my bio picture: same dock, same chair, different year.  And maybe even same shirt, as we shop the same place.

Very Clever

Passed this joint on a walk about yesterday in downtown TO.

In case you don't get it, the Toronto Raptor's new slogan is "We The North".

And, in case you didn't know it - Part Deux - Canada just passed a bill legalizing weed.

Risky Business....?

Hmmm....not so sure I want to eat at a place called Wako Sushi.

I went inside and saw that their motto is;  "We're Wako!  We Don't Refrigerate Anything!"

I've Seen This Movie Before - Toronto Version

"Two of these things are not like the others. "

I think these two little guys, on Sheppard Ave at Bayview, are doomed.  There are high-rises all around them now.

But not too long ago, Sheppard was lined with little bungalows all like this.

So what happened?

Obviously Toronto housing rices have gone through the roof in the last 20 years.

But here it is due to one event;  the Sheppard "subway to nowhere".

This subway line has been mocked forever, saying the density was too low to support a subway.

It still has low ridership, but it is increasing rapidly each year.

So this post could have been called "If You Built It, They Will Built It".

Because at the intersection where each station is, massive development is taking place.

Above used to be a dusty, quiet little corner, with all bungalows.

Not any more.

So where is it smarter to build a subway;  on a dusty quiet little corner with few tall buildings, and let the growth come to them?

Or on a densely populated street, lined with high-rises?  Can you say "Eglinton Crosstown LRT"?

For people living on or even near Eglinton, or trying to drive on it, this is a ten year disaster.

The Sheppard way, a couple of little bungalows up there will meet their demise.  But I don't think the owners will be too upset.

From The "Why Didn't I Think Of That" File - Part Deux

I guess chocolate manufacturers must have been thinking, "How can we sell more candy?"

"Make it like a vitamin!  That it is actually good for you!"

I think this must have have been how Arm & Hammer increased their sales a long time ago.

They probably sat around brainstorming, "How can we sell more baking soda?  A tablespoon here and there in your muffins isn't doing it for us."

So somebody must have said, "Why don't we get them to open a box and put it in the fridge.  And just leave it there!"

"Ha ha, hilarious!"

"Oh oh oh, here's another one - open a whole box.  And then throw it down the sink!!"

"Unbelievable!  You're a genius!"

Or something close to that........



[Post Script:  Coincidentally, in today's paper, an actual article about what chocolate manufacturers are trying to do as people turn away from chocolate to healthier options.  I suggest they go to Shoppers Drugmart and check out what Jamieson has already done!]

From The "Why Didn't I Think Of That" File

How often have you been getting your hair cut and thought "Man, I wish I was underground!"

It seems so obvious now.

Read The Fine Print

Or at least look up.

In the 1930's, when this neighbourhood was being developed, they buried a pesky creek - Ames Creek - as it had been giving the developers problems.

However, as usual, Mother Nature always wins.

The buried creek, that they then built the houses on top of, weakened the foundations so much the houses are tipping into each other, as you can see by the eavestroughs overlapping and the chimneys touching!

The whole street is like that.

I'm guessing it's kind of difficult to sell a home in this neighbourhood.